


Death of a Bachelor

by orphan_account



Category: Panic! at the Disco
Genre: Established Relationship, Everyone stays in the band au kind of, M/M, Ryden, just go along with it okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-19
Updated: 2016-01-19
Packaged: 2018-05-14 21:49:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5760109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Brendon wants to marry Ryan, but isn't so sure yet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Death of a Bachelor

**Author's Note:**

> a proposal blurb. i wrote this a few months ago when i didn't really know much about p!atd or the split, so please forgive me... enjoy!

“Bren, what’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?” His voice snaps me from my thoughts, making me jump and my eyes go wide. “Sorry baby, didn’t mean to scare you.” I run my fingers through my brown hair and look up at him.  
“You didn’t scare me, just startled, ‘s all.” I mumble. He leans in to kiss me, and I kiss back, moving over on the couch to make room for my boyfriend.  
I never thought this would happen. Me, in a relationship. I always used to be the party boy who would get drunk every night and go to clubs and shit like that. One night stands every night with a different person. It didn’t matter to me, I guess I would identify as pansexual, but I don’t really like to label. Then Ryan came along. Well, I guess he was along the whole time. But I had feelings for him. I didn’t know what love was until I met Ryan Ross. 

I wrap my arms around his smaller figure and kiss his temple. The rest of the guys call us cute and sappy. I’m not sure if I like “cute and sappy”. The only thing I’m sure of is that I’m in love with Ryan. Today we’re off of tour, and recording, and all band shit. The other guys are out partying. I miss that a little bit. Actually, if I’m not lying, I’d say that I miss partying more than I should. 

I’ve been thinking a lot about my life with Ryan. I do love partying, I guess it’s what comes with being the lead singer. But I love Ryan, so much that my heart could burst.  
“You never answered my question. What’s up, babe?” He asks.  
“I’m just thinking a lot now, that’s all. About us, I guess.” I answer truthfully.  
“You want to be out with the guys, don’t you?” He looks at me knowingly. I frown. Ryan can read me better than anyone I’ve ever met. Sometimes it comes in handy, but others it leads to fights and an annoyed Ryan sleeping on the couch. Tonight cannot be one of those nights.  
“Kind of, but I’d rather be here with you. It’s our first night off in a while, we never get to do this.” I say. I grab my laptop and pick out some random movie on Netflix, pulling him closer to me and kissing him again. 

As we’re lying there, I think instead of paying attention to the movie. Ryan looks so beautiful, with his bed head and sweatpants on. He’s perfect to me. Well, not perfect, but so close. He has flaws, everyone does. What love is, is realizing that someone has flaws and scars and has made mistakes, but still loving them and thinking they’re amazingly beautifully wonderful. And that’s what I think of Ryan. I look over at him, staring intently at Despicable Me, and I think ‘I want to marry you.’ 

Woah. Well, that escalated quickly. Where did that thought come from? It makes sense. We’ve been together for around 3 years, my parents love him and I think his parents love me, and most importantly, I’m in love with him. I want to marry him.

But if I marry him, I’ll never be able to party, or go out to clubs. I’ll be tied down to one person for the rest of my life. Tied down. That seems like a dirty word (err, phrase). It’s been 3 years since a one-night stand. I’ve been doing this for 3 years, can I do it for more? I won’t be a bachelor ever again. And kids. I know he wants kids, but I don’t know if I do. Do I know what I’ll be getting into? Oh shit, a midlife crisis. (Brendon, you’re like 28, calm down.)  
Ryan notices me tense up. “In your own thoughts again, Brendon?” He asks. All I can do is nod. He pulls me closer, but I wriggle out of his grasp.  
“I think I need a glass of water. I’ll be right back.” I hop off of the couch into the small kitchen of the tour-bus. 

“Anything you want to tell me?” Ryan appears, seemingly out of nowhere.  
“Um.” I’m at a loss for words. “How do you feel about getting married?” I swallow hard.  
“Is this your way of proposing to me?” He asks playfully. I shake my head.  
“I just want to know what you think.”  
“I think that I would love to marry you when you’re ready, Bren. I’m not going to pressure you, but I would never be opposed to it. I think you’re the person I’ve been searching for since I learned about ‘the one’ or whatever that’s supposed to mean.” He says sincerely, and my heart bubbles. “Why are you asking me this?”  
“I was just thinking a lot, I guess.” I pour water from the pitcher into my glass. He nods.  
“I love you, you know.” He reminds me. I kiss him, wrapping my arms around him and holding him there for a bit.  
“I love you too, Ry.”

The next day, I go shopping.  
And then the day after that, we have a show.

“I wrote this song hoping that someday I’d have a meaning for it, a reason to play it. And tonight, I have that. This song is called Death of a Bachelor, and just have patience, okay?” I shout through my microphone. Ryan looks confused, but plays anyways. I sing like I’m not panicking (hehe, get it?) on the inside. I know that my plan will go well, there’s just a small chance that it won’t.  
We finish the song. Everyone except Ryan knows what’s going on. It’s quite cute and funny watching his brow furrow in confusion when the entire band stops.  
“In high school, I met someone. This guy was special. And I don’t know how to put into words what I think of him, cause it’s just that weird and confusing and beautiful. We started dating around 3 years ago, in 2013. We finally realized that we had been kind of dancing around our feelings for each other, and I kissed him, for real, on January 13, 2013. And then I asked him to be my boyfriend. He said yes.”  
Ryan’s eyes go wider than they already are. He’s smiling his beautiful smile, and sitting down on one of the black square block things on the stage.  
“I think you all are wondering why I sang Death of a Bachelor live, cause I don’t really like doing that all that much. That’s because I never had meaning for it until now. And I really hope he realizes what I’m doing right now.”  
Ryan nods, covering his face with his hands. His cheeks are a deep red, and I can see them under the light of the stage.  
“So, Mr. George Ryan Ross the Third, we talked about this two days ago, and I’ve finally cleared my mind enough to say this.”  
I get down on one knee and pull a box out of my pocket.  
“Will you marry me?” I open the box to reveal a very punk rock silver ring with a diamond in the middle.  
Ryan stares at it for a moment, gathering his thoughts. “Yeah.” He says, almost a whisper so that the crowd can’t hear. I give them the thumbs up, and get up so that I can kiss him. And I do.  
Yeah, I do.


End file.
